Today I realize that I don’t have to be brilliant or productive to be helpful. As often said, the most precious gift is one’s time.
I was tired and about to go for another errand but saw a friend alone eating. I said hi and he said he had some gossipy stories to tell. So we chatted and turned out that he was frustrated over work relationships.
I just listened and reflected back what he said. I couldn’t help but giving my opinion.
When we parted, I found I learned something new about him though we have been friends for 15 years. Our chats were probably balmy to him that he lined to thank me.
I was tired and about to go for another errand but saw a friend alone eating. I said hi and he said he had some gossipy stories to tell. So we chatted and turned out that he was frustrated over work relationships.
I just listened and reflected back what he said. I couldn’t help but giving my opinion.
When we parted, I found I learned something new about him though we have been friends for 15 years. Our chats were probably balmy to him that he lined to thank me.
What exactly did you do for him?
Umm.. what I did differently was that I sensed that he was in pain and I was not rushing to get him or me anywhere. More presence. Like just getting out of a retreat gave me energy to be present.
Good reflecting question.
To me, curiosity grants me patience when people ramble on and on. I interrupted him too to reflect the causes and effects of his frustration. Like this is what you think is happening and why. My putting it succinctly got him to see his position. He can be very cloudy.
หลังๆ ชั้นแทบไม่พยายามเปลี่ยนใครด้วย I thus become less overbearing.
I was surprised to hear him said that he gave up trying to change himself for others. I said why don’t you change yourself for yourself. I change myself sometimes to please others but it is still for me, to make them like me. แต่อันนี้เพิ่งคิดได้
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